Monica Wilson and Raymond Feliciano Interview

Dublin Core

Title

Monica Wilson and Raymond Feliciano Interview

Subject

Social Equity Commons Oral History

Description

Interview to Monica and Raymond about their experience as ESOL teachers at Bladensburg High School.

Creator

PGCMLS, Bladensburg Branch Library

Publisher

Prince George's special collection staff

Date

May 8, 2024

Rights

Format

mp3

Language

English

Type

Digital audio

Identifier

200013

Oral History Item Type Metadata

Original Format

.wav

Duration

1 hour 05:01 min

Transcription

Project:  Social equity commons Oral History
Chapter: Monica and Raymond interview. 
Date: May 8, 2024
Participants: 
Interviewer: Norman Lezama. 
Interviewee: Monica Wilson and Raymond Feliciano


  • 00:00 Norman: Hello, everyone. Welcome. Today is May 8, 2024 at the Bladensburg Library. My name is Norman Lezama. I'm a public specialist II, here at the Library Social Equity Commons, and I'm here with: 
  • 00:17 Monica: Monica Wilson. I am a Spanish teacher and department chair for world languages at Bladensburg High School.
  • 00:24 Raymond: And I am Raymond Feliciano. I am an ESOL and English teacher at Bladensburg High School, and I also serve as the equity liaison for this school. 
  • 00:32 Norman: Awesome. We're recording this interview as part of the PGCMLS Oral History Project. Since you already said your names, what languages do you speak? 
  • 00:42 Monica: I speak Spanish and English. 
  • 00:44 Raymond: I also speak Spanish and English.
  • 00:46 Norman: Awesome. I'd love to start this podcast, just understanding where you come from, what era did you grow up in, and how was like going, growing up in the schools that you were at?
  • 00:58 Monica: Okay. Well, I'll start. I came to the United States in 1986, so that's been quite a while, and I started at Northwestern High School as an ESOL student. I went through high school, and I went straight through college to Goucher College, and became a teacher in 1995, I believe, 95 or 96. 
  • 01:21 Norman: Awesome. How was it like being in the schooling system at that time?
  • 01:27 Monica: It was very different. I'm not sure how to compare. It would be almost like comparing apples and oranges, because the culture was very different back then in the make of the school. It was, for me, difficult because English was my second language, and it took me about a year and a half to learn enough to go to college, so it was challenging. But it was very academically inclined. I had a lot of good influences with my teachers, my counselor, and they helped me all the way through.
  • 01:59 Norman: Awesome, thank you 
  • 02:01 Raymond: So in my case, I grew up in Puerto Rico. I went my entire schooling over there. I did pre-k  all the way through senior year, and then I went to college there also. I came here to Maryland in 2017 when I got my teaching profession. So I, it's similar, and it's different, you know, like growing up in the school system there, because we're part of the U.S. in terms of education and all of that. So a lot of that is very similar. There are, of course, you know, differences, like the makeup of Puerto Rico is 99% Latino. Most of the classes are in Spanish, and then depending on which school you were,  some of them have bilingual programs. But then one of the things that kind of helped me is that we had to take English as a mandatory class in kindergarten. Now our English class I would say was the mix of what we call English and the ESOL Services here, kind of like embedded into one. So yeah, it has been different being in the classroom here in Maryland. But you know, I didn't go to school here, so I don't have something to compare, but I know it's been very different from when I was in school back in Puerto Rico. 
  • 03:29 Norman Awesome, awesome. Thank you for sharing. Now you did talk about being, growing up a little bit, the bilingual side and learning over here. How has that impacted you?
  • 03:39 Monica: Well, for me, coming from Guatemala, I came, so in Guatemala, we go to elementary school, then we attend what is called the basic grades, which for here, chronologically, would be 17 to 89. But in Guatemala, once you get out of elementary school, you're supposed to know your basics, you know, for reading and writing. And so seventh, eighth, and ninth, it's supposed to be almost like the equivalent of high school. So ninth graders over there would be considered very mature people that are ready for the workforce. So coming to the United States was a culture shock for me, because ninth graders are not exactly considered mature here. And I could not understand that part of the culture. So it took a little bit of time for me to get adjusted to that kind of thing. I had a lot less homework here in the U.S. And so I actually made up homework and looked for opportunities to do extra work when I came the first couple of years and then, you know, of course, it was easy to adapt. But I can definitely say that I have more opportunity to learn a lot more about different topics and subjects here in the U.S. And Guatemala, I would say it was a system where, at least back then, memorize and, you know, recall, but here you do a lot more higher-level thinking exercises. And that was a big difference, especially with testing. So I'm great at writing, but the test taking has taken me a while to get, you know, better at. So it's different.
  • 05:20 Norman: Yeah. 
  • 05:22 Raymond: Well, in my case, it's hard to explain because Puerto Rico is kind of like in the in-between of being like a different country, but also being part of the U.S. as a state. And that applies a lot into how the education system works there. So I learned English in school. I wouldn't consider my family bilingual. But my family in general, they were very strong advocates of education. Like my grandma was the first in the family to finish high school. So the expectation was that every new generation does something more, right? So my mom was the first one to go to college. And then, like, my mom wanted for us to do more. So education was always very big in my family. So my parents were very involved. When I was in elementary school, I thought of English just like that one extra class that people take and never use because I was like, I was never going to use English outside of it. It wasn't until I got to high school when I started realizing, hey, like everything that we have here come from the U.S., right? And it wasn't until I got to high school that I was like I'm going to get really serious about learning my English. And I told my mom, hey, mom, I don't want to wait for this book that I love to be translated because it takes forever for it to be translated. So I got a copy of the book. It took me forever. But I finished the first book and then I was like, I did it. And, you know, I also had the idea of I want to go to college from ninth grade because my school was a school that really pushed college from ninth grade. Like, they took us to college first and all of that. So I already had this idea of I want to go somewhere else. And, you know, I knew that English was going to be important because it's kind of like the universal language for communications and everything. So I was like, I need to know English. And it worked well. I graduated from high school and when I went to college and, you know, in college, it's different. My textbooks were all in English. I had classes with teachers that the only language they spoke was English. So for me, it forced me to kind of like use those skills that I didn't know I already have. And, you know, it worked for me. Now, I will say it did require a lot of initiative on my part on learning English. If I had just done the school work, I don't think I would have become fluent if I did not want to do other challenges. And one of my biggest challenges was that I really wanted to get out of the, I don't know how to speak the English part phase because I know how to, you know, you first learn how to listen, then, you know, how to do the writing, how to do the reading, but I would panic with the speaking part. So when I was in college, I said, I'm going to go an student exchange and I decided to go to the one place in the entire country where I knew I was not going to find a single person that spoke Spanish. So I went to the state of Maine for student exchange. And it worked. Like, it really forced me to, you know, to be exposed there. And then I realized that, you know, I could do it. I could communicate with people and that it wasn't as terrifying as people think it is.
  • 09:13 Norman: You know, before we came down here and spoke, both of you talked about how learning multiple languages opens up your mind and just hearing your story a little bit just sees how much you have opened yourself to learning different things, exposing yourself to getting the position where you have to learn the language, which open up opportunities. And you already alluded a little bit about your college life, but I would love to hear a little bit more about how college was like for the both of you. 
  • 09:41 Monica: College was probably, I would consider it the most fun time where I had, you know, the least responsibilities with the most fun and freedom, especially coming from my Hispanic family, right? Yes, I went to Goucher College and I was there for four years. I graduated in four years with a Bachelor of Arts and my two majors were psychology and Spanish. My initial thinking was that I was going to become a family therapist. And then, you know, I found out that I could go to the route of teaching for school loan forgiveness. But it did work because after five years of working after college, I found that teaching was my passion. So while I was at Goucher, I did experiment with education courses. My main load was psychology, but the education courses that I took, the teachers that were there were fantastic mentors. And we went to schools around the Baltimore area to visit, you know, the different types of schools who went to private schools and public schools and elementary and high school. And so I got a good taste. I also had the opportunity to dabble a little bit into experimenting with psychology. And so I just loved working with people. My college really did prepare me to be able to at least try to understand people and work with them in a way that I could, you know, communicate. And it just prepared me while I was coming as a teacher. I don't think if I, if I did not have the psychology background that I had at Goucher, I don't think I would have made it through teaching. 
  • 11:29 Raymond: Well, in my case, I loved college. Like if I could do college all over again, I would definitely do it. If only it wasn't that expensive, right? So originally, you know, like for me, college was kind of like, okay, my parents want me to go to college. I have to go to college. Like that was not going was not an option in my family. So when I was younger, I really didn't care that much about it. Then in high school, you know, like, you go to the college first and all that was like, oh my god, like this is actually super cool. I was really excited. When I started, I started as a double major in chemistry and biology. Because my goal was to, after my bachelor's, either go to med school or go to pharmacist school. I loved sciences. But then it hit me that I like working with people. I didn't want to be like lock in the lab all the time. So I took an elective class. I believe it was called philosophy of education. It was pretty boring. But what I really liked about the class was that they made us teach each other. Like we have to like basically present and teach the rest of the classmates. And I realized I like doing this. I like helping people learn. And when I decided to switch majors, all of my friends were like, why don't you become a teacher? Either way, when we study, we study with you trying to explain to us. And then it hit me like when I was a little kid, that was my strategy. I had like all of my toys in mind. And I will pretend that I was the teacher and I will try to teach seventh grade math to my toy because I was crazy. I don't know. And then I switched to education. And I loved it. My favorite classes, you know, like I love reading. I love books. So I love all of my literature courses. My linguistics courses really helped me understand a lot of how the language works. Because a lot of people think, oh, language is just, you know, you talk and you understand that. But there's a lot more that goes beyond that. Culture impacts your understanding of language. If you already know a language that impacts how you learn a second language. And I don't know. Once I started, I wasn't sure if I was going to like it until I started actually working with kids in my student teaching. And I realized I like working with kids. They, they stress you out, but they keep you young at the same time, I think. 
  • 14:23 Norman: I agree. I feel like every time I talk to folks who are educators they’re really passionate about their career path, it's always like a calling for it. Sometimes they don't even start off wanting to do it. But somehow it just, when your past experiences from meeting different people, you just end up just being an educator. And I know you talked a little bit about how in your psychology classes has impacted you and your field work. I would love to hear a little bit more about what else, what kind of classes impacted you about impacted, you and to take you where you are right now. 
  • 14:58 Monica: Okay. So yes. So going back, I had amazing teachers in college. And so, as I mentioned before, my majors were to psychology and Spanish. And I had this one Spanish teacher that was amazing. I had so much respect for her. And I remember sitting in class with her thinking, one day I wish I could be like her, you know, but then I was like, no, I'm not going to be a Spanish teacher, because I was in psychology. Then my psychology teachers were really cool also, but they also did a lot of, you know, lab things where we were just doing the statistics for the studies that we did. That was not really my thing. It was cool to see the results, but it was not as interesting. But teaching and, you know, when we went through Don Quixote and, you know, such a thick book, you know, with old Spanish and this teacher made it so interesting in the way that we were analyzing it. I thought, wow, if you could just analyze literature like that, that's actually fun. And so it wasn't just one class, but it was this one teacher who really inspired me to want to be like her at some point in the future. 
  • 16:10 Norman: If you can make Don Quixote interesting.
  • 16:13 Monica: Exactly. 
  • 16:13 Norman: Once, I remember once I had someone really explain it to me, I was like, wow, this is actually a cool book. 
  • 16:20 Monica: Yes, exactly. So much culture, so many hidden meanings of objects that would mean something completely different that they couldn't say, you know, just that face value, but they could hide their political views. And I was just like, wow, that's amazing. They didn't get killed.
  • 16:38 Norman: This just blows your mind. 
  • 16:39 Monica: Yes. Well, yeah, exactly. And she made it so interesting that, you know, I was just like, wow, blown away by that. 
  • 16:48 Raymond: I think the funniest part of the Quixote is that, you know, it's the oldest novel and nobody has been able to replicate what, you know, Migjel de Cervantes did. And, you know, it's a very thick and very hard book to understand. And yeah, so in my case, when I was in college, I had two professors that I was like, I want to be like them. If I become a teacher, one was my linguistics professor, Dr. Liada, I love that woman. She was so organized. And I was like, how does she do all of this? Because she was, you know, she teaches grad school, she teaches undergrad, all of those things. She was always on point and her classes were very structured. And I was like, I don't know, I was very impressed with her way of teaching and all of that. And then the other one was my literature professor, Dr. Mo. Like the way she talked about books reminded me of how I used to talk to my mom about books. My mom is the other reader in the family, right? So I was like, if I ever become a teacher, I want to be like a mix of both of them, like the passion for books that my literature professor had with the structure and, you know, the way of working of my linguistics professor. But I think other than them, what really influenced me becoming a teacher was my family. My family really educated us when we were growing up, you know, that the two most important things in any society or like in life are health and education. Like you need to be healthy and you need to learn as much as you can so you can do more. And, you know, my parents were very intentional with the schools that they sent my siblings. And I like, I remember for elementary school, like we had to go to our boundary school. And when Puerto Rico kind of got rid of that, my parents, they looked for a school that had a better rate. And from middle school, I ended up going to a STEM magnet school. And when I went to that school, it was like being in college. Like, of course, they adapted it a little bit because we were like 13, 14, 15 back then. But the expectation was that we needed to be able to labs. We needed to be able to do science reports. We needed to present to an audience. We needed to do so many things that we cannot do that much I guess in school today, 
  • 19:32 Monica: College prep. 
  • 19:34 Raymond: And, you know, when I went to college, I was a lot readier academically than a lot of the other kids that started with me. Now, it was a struggle for me because I started when I was 16. So I was, of course, 16 years old in college. So of course, there were some issues because I thought I was grown, but I was not grown yet. And then, you know, like they were, my mom was being a Hispanic mama bear. She was like, no, you, you, you still need to do things. But yeah, but I think, you know, other than those two teachers, it was when you actually studied, like teaching is like a science. It's not just, oh, I'm just going to give a kid a worksheet. And, you know, when you realize all of that thought that goes through it, it's like, I found that really fascinating because you need to understand the kids, you need to learn about their families. It's not just about the content. There are so many different factors. So it's like kind of like playing a game to find out what is it that is going to work. Sometimes you win and you celebrate. Sometimes you feel like you're the worst teacher ever, but then the next day you're like, okay, I'm going to go try it. 
  • 20:18 Monica: It's definitely a puzzle with different pieces and you don't always get the right pieces. You have to make them. 
  • 21:02 Raymond: And there's so many moving pieces. Sometimes I feel it's like they have two boxes of puzzles and they just mix the pieces. 
  • 21:09 Norman: I love hearing the stories about you being college because yeah, college for me as well is such an exciting time. You already talked about your professors that really influenced you. Are there any other people who have influenced you like that? And do you find yourself incorporating a lot of the things that they've done for you in your own teaching?
  • 21:27 Monica: Absolutely. So I definitely have to say that my father, from when I was a little girl, he never gave me another option but to go to college somehow. So he wouldn't even get me, let me get a job when I was in high school because he was like, no, you are going to focus in school and you're going straight to college. And so he was a big influence. He didn't tell me what to study, but his advice was always find your passion and do that. 
  • 21:56 Raymond: I think it's funny that you say that because for me it was my mom. And you know, I think parents sometimes underestimate the impact that they might have on their kids. Like I said, my mom was that first time, you know, first generation college student. So in my parent household, going to college is a mandatory thing. You have no choice on that. You can choose where to go and what to study, but no, it's not an answer. But I would say my mom was the most influential piece other than my teachers. And I had the privilege of having a lot of good teachers. You know, my mom always had high expectations from us. I remember when I was in school that I thought a B was a bad grade, you know, like a B is bad. Because my mom always told me, you can do better. I know you can do better. And that always forced me to kind of like, also have that mentality that if I know that I'm not giving my best, you know, I will feel like I was failing myself. So the fact that they had good expectations and not not just good expectations, but high expectations. And, you know, they kind of match what my teachers expected from me. That really helped. And that is what I try to see with my students, you know, like I, I expect excellence from my students. I don't expect perfection, but I expect excellence. I want for them to come to class. I want for them to be responsible. I want for them to be dedicated to their work. And a lot of that come from my mom. Like, like with Monica, I was not allowed to have a job until I was in college. And then my first two years of college, my parents told me, you can only work in the summer. You cannot work your first two years. And then when I did get a job, you know, there was the rule, you can have a job as long as your grades don't slip. You can have a job as long as it's part-time. And as long as it fits in your schedule, if it gives you a problem, school comes first. And, you know, in a way, I was privileged enough, you know, that my parents did not need for me to work, you know, because both of my parents work and all. I know not all of the kids have that.
  • 24:33 Monica: Yeah, actually, when I got to college, I had to work to be part of the work study program. But it was expected that the number one priority was studying. So I had, you know, like a desk job where I could actually study while I was working and it was okay to do that. I had another year. I was a receptionist in one of the halls. I could also study there. And I actually got a lot of studying done. So, you know, I did need to work, but the work was compatible with my priority of having school first. 
  • 25:07 Raymond: And, you know, I had a similar experience, like my first job was in a store. And the moment my work schedule started being difficult, you know, to schedule my class and my friends were like, no, you're gonna quit. And I was like, okay. And then I did start working at the work study program in college. And, you know, you still have to like go to work and you still have to, you know, supervisor and all of that. But in a way that allowed me to also study, I was in campus, so I could go make coffee during my break. And the fact that, you know, there was the expectation that in the university, I also had to keep a GPA if I wanted to keep my scholarships, my stuff, you know, I was like, I need to make sure that I have my A game so I can keep all of these support.
  • 25:55 Norman: All right. So, from both of your stories, I hear how your parents really instill that passion for education and the importance of it. How was your experience when you first entered as an ESL educator and being a Spanish teacher or just an educator in general in our community?
  • 26:13 Monica: Oh, wow. Yeah. So I was fresh out of college at the age of 22. When I started teaching and I remember my first month of school, I was ready to change the world and I was going to be, you know, very strict. And then I get the first student who was absent for the first 20 days of school. And upon his return, I'm trying to be a tough teacher. And I asked him, Hey, where were you all these days? And he was coming up from being locked up in his words for stabbing someone. And so, and he was in my class. And then I found that in his record, you know, and I can't say too much about it. But basically, he had a strong record and he was only 13 at the time. And that was the population that I was going to be working with. So I thought, of course, you know, what have I done? But it opened my eyes to the population that I was going to be teaching here. I had textbooks where Don Quixote was one of the books that we were supposed to read. But my students could barely read Spanish or English. And, you know, the whole thought processes were very difficult for them because they didn't have to analyze things before. And they're just trying to survive a lot of students with trauma and, you know, as I learned later, the brain that has gone through trauma learns differently. And so I had to do a whole lot of learning that I did not learn in college. A lot of my psychology and health. But there was a whole lot that I needed to investigate and research and apply to my teaching so I could be an effective teacher. So my first couple of years were rough, because I had to adapt to my audience. I had to reorganize my own thinking as to what was going to be what I wanted to accomplish with them. Was that really the best for them that I had in mind? You know, analyzing, you know, a great novel was not really their first priority. It was surviving. So how am I going to teach them skills that will be relevant to their lives? And that, you know, that when that hit me, I realized the magnitude of, you know, the influence that we have with the students, because to them can definitely be a life or death. You know, I like changing events to be in your classes. And thankfully, I've had, you know, in the time this is technically my 11th year with the county. And I now get the students who are professionals who have graduated and moved on. Now they have careers. And it's just so amazing to see how just a little bit that we do in the classroom can completely change their path. It's very rewarding. But it is very hard. And as we said before, it's like a puzzle and, sometimes we don't feel like we have all the pieces to put the whole puzzle together. But you know, there's different teachers, different counselors, and we all have a little piece. And when the students graduate, it's amazing to see, you know, what we have been able to help with in their lives. 
  • 29:27 Raymond: So when I, when I first started, you know, my first reaction was, oh my god. Like, I, and I think every teacher goes through what you just described, because I also, you know, like I graduated and I was like, I'm going to be the best teacher ever. I'm going to help teach kids, they're going to go to the best universities, they're going to do an amazing thing. And, you know, the university kind of like puts it in, you know, like, you have to be this teacher that is thinking outside the box, you have to be innovative and all of that. So you're used to that, because that's what they're asking for you to do. Then you go to your job interview and you're like, what are you going to do to change education, blah, blah, blah, blah. And then you give your ideas. And then you get to the classroom. And that is when you hit the wall. That as teachers, your hands are very tied on what we can do. And that has been one of my biggest struggles as a teacher. Because I am the kind of person that if something is not working, I try to find a workaround. And, but everything is so complicated. Like, I teach 10th grade. And I get students that when they have their reading free test, they perform on a third or fifth grade level. And I'm not talking about the kid that came from Guatemala, like Monica, in the 10th grade, or that came from Guatemala in the ninth grade, I'm talking about kids born and raised here. So, you know, I am very big on having high expectations. I am very big on, you know, school is not a social club, school is academic, you're supposed to be here to work. But then you see the students. And I'm like, how am I going to get this kid to be able to meet all of these standards in five months when they're reading on a third grade level. And then when you go talk to them, then you realize this kid doesn't even know how to read in his first language. 
  • 31:44 Raymond: You learn that this kid has interrupted education. You learn that this kid is here as a refugee. You learn this other kid is here with an immigration case. You learn that this kid is a teen parent. You learn that this kid has cancer. You learn that this kid is living by himself. So, and our hands are tied, like, people say, well, that is a teacher's job. But then I'm like, we're not magicians. Like, we're not therapists. We're not social workers that can just give you food or, you know, shelter and all of that. And it's getting, it's very frustrating because you cannot do your job, which is the academic part when all of the, all of the other needs of the kid are not being met. But then you have so very little power on what you can do. And then there are so many moving pieces, like what we teach in the classroom is not even decided by us. It's politicians who decide that's what we're going to do. Everything is about test scores. It's not really about, you know, whether the kid is learning something that they want to learn or that they will find useful in their career. There's also a great disparity on the student population that we have. You know, this is a primarily African American county. But in our school, you know, it's a primarily Latino student population. They come with different expectations. They come with different realities. And when you look at the curriculum, when you look at the instructional materials that are approved by the board that we can use, sometimes you're like, I don't know how to make this interesting for them so that they can engage. But we try to do the best we can with what we have. And what I've learned the most is the best I can do is at least make sure that the kid comes to class. And if they learn something, they learn something. You know, they might not be the best test takers, their test scores might not be the best. But I have to say, my kids are very sweet kids. Sometimes, you know, you hear about, you know, what people think of the school and the students and I'm like, I don't have problems with my students with discipline and all of that. In fact, I love when they come to visit me and, you know, during our lunch break we play uno cards and you get to know them. And I think it's funny because you learn about them, but then they learn about you. You know, we were, I talked to one of my students the other day and I was like, yeah, when I was writing my poetry book, they're like, you're a writer, did you publish a book. And then they were like, can I read it? And I was like, you're asking me to read something. I was so surprised. And, you know, I gave the student my copy and the student loved it. And then he was like, this is the first book that I actually finished. And I was like, that made me proud. You know, I accomplished something. I have a student, you know, when we started doing poetry, he normally doesn't participate. And he was like, can you give me feedback on some of my poems? And I'm like, okay. So it's just, I feel like sometimes we focus too much on all of the negatives of the work. But, you know, at the end of the day, we're there for the kids. And I think that's the most important part. 
  • 35:22 Monica: Yeah, I have to say, I consider myself really lucky, I guess, and blessed because in Spanish, we have a lot more room for fun. And yes, we do have, you know, the curriculum, but it doesn't tie me down. There's a lot that I can do thinking outside of the box. And so this year, we have done a lot of fun activities. And it has actually, even though it has been a very difficult year with testing and all of that, it has been a really fun year of learning with my students. And at the end of this year, we actually, in our school, we had 27 students earn the seal of biliteracy, which is a high honor here in the county. And that was, you know, an effort from the school in our world language department. And so I'm very happy with that. And if anything, I believe that we are there to give our students hope. And if we could just give them hope, that's really the fuel that they need for the future. You know, they can come from whatever, I mean, their past can look, you know, the hardest. But if we can just focus them to look forward and take that past experience as something that they can use to enhance the future and have them, you know, have hope that they can help other people that might have been in their situation, I think that sparks a light in them that nobody will be able to quench. And, you know, now that we're graduating the seniors, a lot of them are coming back and letting us know, hey, yeah, thank you. You gave me hope when I can fight for, you know, what's coming in the future. And they're seeing life in a different light. In the very beginning of the year, I did this project, it was called the Life Project with them. And every single one of my students learned what values are, so vocabulary in there, action verbs and things, they all had to put a little PowerPoint presentation together of what their main values would be and what their tendencies would be for something that would be a passion in their life. And as a result of that, we, that kind of set the tone for the rest of the year. And so now that we are at the end of the year, a lot of them have at least a little, most of them have an idea of what they can pursue. 
  • 37:36 Raymond: And that's my favorite part of being a teacher. When you have the former students and they come to visit you out of the blue and you're like, oh my god, you were my student like three years ago. Like, we have a student that is now in the military, he came to visit us out of the blue. And I was like, when I had him as a student, I would have never thought he was going to join the military. But he's thriving in the military. I also have students, you know, that one of them invited me to his wedding. I went to their baby shower also. So, you know, like getting them, you know, to getting to experience that part of their life is also pretty cool. And, you know, it makes me feel like, you know, we did our job to help them.
  • 38:24 Norman: Yeah, so you talked about the community that you're serving. You talked about what you've enjoyed most about serving this community and what you enjoy most, enjoy most engaging with your students. But talk a little bit about some of the challenges that you faced. And how did you change your role as an educator to adapt to that, to those challenges? 
  • 38:48 Monica: So we have some heavy, heavy challenges. And I would say, I don't know how to get this nicely across, but we need parents to be parents. A lot of our parents are missing in action. And high school is not the place to let go of your children, if anything, is when they need you the most. Because as I said before, you know, when, when I've had, I've had meetings with parents, and I tell them when they're in kindergarten, you know, and they fall, you kiss their Boo Boo and they're okay. When they're in high school, if they get bullied, we've had, you know, suicides, we've had bullying that's really heavy. And this is the time where parents need to be parents. They're parents that we don't see until the end of the year. And they realize their darling is not graduating because they've been skipping all year. And we have been making phone calls in September and we haven't found them. Other times, students who are super bright, the parents themselves tell us, hey, you know, what's the point? They're just gonna have to work because we don't have money for college anyway. And so educating the parents has been one of the biggest challenges. Having them be available to be the parent. Because we are there to educate. And as we say, we're there to teach the subject, not to, you know, give them like morals and values, all of that should come from home. But we're getting so many students who have not had any of that training. And they look to us for that. You know, I have students who call me mom. You know, when it feels awkward sometimes, but I can see where they're coming from, you know, some of them don't have parents here. Some of them have come and they live with their aunts and uncles who have their own lives, their own families, and provide a place for them to live. But they're not able to care for them as high school students. So they're pretty much on their own and they're working. They work after school. So I have students falling and sleeping class all the time. And sometimes I feel really bad because I'm like, you know, you need to wake up. But then I know they're going to be working until 2am. And although that's illegal, they still do it. Because they have to make ends meet. And so I have to adapt. I have to give as much opportunity for them to complete the work in the classroom during my period and try not to give them too much homework because I know they're going to be working any other time that they're not in school. So that's a big, big challenge. And then there's another challenge since we mentioned that we have, you know, such a high percentage of Hispanics. We are actually seeing right now a thing where we have native speakers who come from their countries. And for the most part, they come from schools where they know their first language is solid and they just have to learn English. But the thought processes are there and it's okay. But then we have a lot of what they call native speakers, but they're really heritage speakers who have learned a little bit of Spanish, but they don't know enough Spanish to influence. But they also don't speak English yet. And so the lack of language in general, it's crazy. Because we don't have the thinking skills in either of the two languages and it's very hard for us to get through to them. And a lot of those students end up being the ones that skip a lot. And, you know, attendance is a big issue and we can't teach them if they're not in class. And again, it goes back to the parents who should be making sure that they're in school. So and then, you know, it gives us the extra job of calling parents every day, you know, to make sure that they know that their student is not in school and that they need to follow up with that. So that adds a lot of hours to our day. 
  • 42:40 Raymond: So for me, when I, you know, coming from Puerto Rico to here, one of the reasons why I wanted to be in this school is because it was mostly Hispanic. So me in my mind, you know, I was like, I am a Latino teacher, I want to go help Latino kids, you know. And in my ignorant mind, back then, I had this idea that we all Hispanics were kind of like the same. And then I started teaching and then I realized, oh my God, that is not true. All of these kids are going through different experiences that I didn't go through. All of these kids are having needs that I didn't even know a teenager could have back then. So my first year was very hard. My second year was better. By my third year, I was getting pretty well with the kids and all of that. But then came the pandemic. And the pandemic, I don't know how to describe it, what was like a kick to the stomach to all of the progress that we had done with the kids because the kids essentially lost an entire year because even though we had online classes, I can tell you most of my  classes only one or two kids would show up. Then we came back from the building and it has been a culture of we need to catch up instead of we need to meet, you know, the standard of where we are supposed to be. So because a lot of those kids, let's say they started ninth grade during the pandemic. So when they went to 10th grade, they didn't have the ninth grade skills, but they were in 10th grade. And, you know, we have tried to provide support on all of that, but there's only so much that we can do 
  • 44:39 Monica: add to that, the addiction to technology. 
  • 44:41 Raymond: Then there's also, you know, they're the pandemic really affected also how they socialize to each other. Like before, I was able to have my kids move around the classroom, talk to each other, and my classes tend to be very lively and all of that. And that was my favorite part of being in the classroom. But after the pandemic, it just got really, really hard to get the kids to even talk. They don't want to talk to me. They don't want to talk to people. They just want to sit there. And okay, let me do the work on my own. And I'm like, okay, but I need you to tell me if you need questions. They don't feel comfortable asking questions either, which it has been very hard for me to kind of like let the kids know like it's okay if you make mistakes, if you let me know. Then of course, the issue with the parents, a lot of the parents don't respond to communications. A lot of them, I don't see them until the end of the year. And most of the parents that do respond to communications that I see are from the kids that are doing really, really good in terms of academic. 
  • 45:49 Monica: And that's why, because they're there. 
  • 45:52 Raymond: And you know, if anything, I have had to kind of like adjust my mentality of what a student was and realize these are not the first of all, the kids are not right. The kids did not grow up with my parents as their parents. And it's a different generation from when I was in school. So like, just like, because we do share a lot of our students. I have students that they come and they're like, I'm falling asleep. And I'm like, part of me wants to be angry because I cannot do the work if you're here sleeping. But part of me is like, okay, you showed up, you're here. But what would I do? Like, if I was in their position, I will be falling asleep too. So I have tried to avoid homework at all costs. Most of the time, if I give them homework is when we're doing our novel study, which is I need to, I need for them to read at home. And I try to give them a reading plan. I try to find audio books. I try to find a digital copy, a physical copy, but they can consume it, you know, as many ways as they can. But I've learned I'm not going to give homework because it's not going to get done. And the priority for them is not school. The priority is I need to go to work because I have to pay my lawyer, I have to pay rent, I have to pay my car, I have to pay, I have to send money to my little sister that is in this other country. And you know, it requires some time. But right now, it is an adjusting process, you know, like before COVID. But when I was like in my third year, I was like, yes, I'm finally figuring out how to be a good teacher for these kids. Thank you. The come the pandemic and I was like, oh, no, all of the progress I made is gone. Because the kids we have before COVID are completely different to what the kids we have now. 
  • 48:03 Monica: It changed their brains for sure.
  • 48:07 Raymond: And, you know, it is, it is very difficult because there's, there's only so much that we can adapt and modify and provide support. But, like Monica said, we need the parents to be parents. And we need accountability also on the kid, because I think, and this is a global thing, in my opinion, you know, because of the pandemic, people is like, lower in the standard in a way. Because like, you know, like, oh, the kids, they, they love all of it, we need to make it easier for them to catch up and all of that. And if anything, we should not, we should not make it easier. Like, because the real world is not going to work like that. So it is very hard because, like, you have your teacher part that is like, I need to do this, but then you have your human part that is like, what would I do in this situation? And it is hard. Attendance is a big problem. Mental health is a big problem. Substance abuse, because of mental health. Like, after the pandemic, we have seen so many things that, at least me, either you get to see before with my student or when I was a student. 
  • 49:33 Monica: And it this year, I had, I would say one, some of the hardest things I saw a couple, more than a couple of students who knew someone who committed suicide that were close to them. And then they showed up to my class and here I am conjugating verbs in Spanish, but they're thinking my best friend is gone. And that was probably some of the hardest moments this year where after class, I would ask them, hey, you know, I noticed that you weren't feeling well, are you okay? And then they would tell me what happened. And it was amazing. You know, I was like, so why are you in class? And they said, you know, it felt like a safe space and they would rather be in my class, being distracted from feeling sad. And, you know, that to me meant so much. They would choose to come to my class to kind of get their head in the right place. And so that's another challenge, you know, the stuff that they go through, emotional, mental health is a big thing.
  • 50:32 Raymond: And, you know, Monica, you mentioned that, you know, we're very big on data, I guess, in every business, you know, I look at my kids data. And a lot of the time I feel like I'm the worst teacher ever. Because I don't like, I know the kids are not making the expectation, they're not meeting the expectations that the state or the standards or, you know, the people that wrote the curriculum have. But then I go to, I go to class, and I have this kid that he comes. And then I learned I am the only teacher he comes to. And he tells me, because I like you. You listen to me. I have students that I have never taught them. I don't know how they find me. But they always go to my class and I'm like, can I stay here? Because I don't feel safe in the cafeteria. I don't feel safe in the, in the library or the gym or wherever there's a lot of students. Can I stay here and get help on homework for the other class? And sometimes I'm like, well, as long as it's not math, you know, I can help you because I'm not good at math. But, you know, like, moments like that make me feel that maybe I'm not such a bad teacher. Because, you know, at the end of the day, when they come and tell me, you know, I graduated, thank you. Earlier this year, I had a student, he failed my class last year. And when the school year started, he came to talk to me and he was like, I need to apologize. And I was like, apologize for what? Because he had not done anything to me. And then he was like, because I know that you really tried with me last year and I just didn't do my part. So that really meant a lot. I had a student last year, his first quarter, terrible attendance, terrible grades. One of his friends told me that his father lived in New York. So I gave him the homework, find me the phone number of the father. And I called that in New York and that came. And he met with me. And after that, he graduated. I mean, no, he didn't graduate. He was a ten grade back then. His grades in my class greatly improved. He passed the state assessment for language acquisition. He passed the state assessment for English. And I look at his grades this year, 11th grade. Excellent grade. He's doing great. So, you know, that was a success story. And then you have these students that they come from really humble families and you're like, they have so much potential and, you know, I know we cannot mention any names, but we have a student coming on. She is working. She is in honor roll. She is also doing nursing. She's taking AP classes. So I'm like, wow, the talent is there, but a lot of the kids don't even know that they can do it because they're used to people expecting very little from them. 
  • 53:46 Monica: Yes. And that's actually a very, very good point because this year I always make it a point to let them know how they have potential. And that's why we did the project that I mentioned, the Project Of Life. And now that I'm reading the reflections at the end of the year, their final exam included a reflection for them to say to me how I help them and how they wish I would have helped them better, you know, just reflecting on the class. And most of the students that have written the reflection so far have told me that I was one of the very few people that told them that they can make it, that they can do something big. And they thanked me and they're saying thank you for telling me that you believe in me because you're one of the very few people that have ever said that they believe in me. So that's, they need to hear that. 
  • 54:31 Norman: So would you say one of the things that changed the way you teach now is just adding that human touch, just that personal, that you just care and wanting to be there for them?
  • 54:44 Monica: For sure. I think that maybe old school would be the teacher gets to class and then they teach the lesson and expects all the students to learn that lesson the same way. Those days are far gone. Now we have to do this thing that at first we kind of hated the differentiation. But it actually, to me, it's just a word to describe the human side of things that every student is unique, not all of them learn the same way. And so I try to use all my five senses to teach my lessons and I'm having a lot of success with them learning that way. So yes, the human side, all of them are unique. And I tell them if there's something that you don't understand, call me. I want to understand how you can get it. And that approach has given me some very, very good results.
  • 55:32 Raymond: And I think also that, you know, a lot of the kids, they come to the school and they don't think education is an important thing. And it's very difficult for them because they might be, they're teenagers now, but teenagers, they're just small adults, right? They're very set on their ways. So, you know, the importance of education needs to come from home. Like people at home need to let them know education is important. Why is that important? Otherwise, the kid is going to grow up in an environment where if education is not important there, they're not going to think it's important anywhere. So why would they go to school to waste your time doing something that is not going to benefit them or that it is important. 
  • 56:24 Norman: Yeah. And before we ask the last question, as we close down, I want to thank the both of you for coming in today. It's been a pleasure just hearing your stories and how we can just hear, know about the stories in our community, right. So the last question I have for the both of you is, what has provided you the most satisfaction in your career as an educator? And what's been the most disappointing?
  • 56:46 Monica: Well, definitely satisfactory is that, you know, now that I have a few years, you know, under my belt, I have gotten to see my students who are now professionals. And I have them, they find me on Facebook. And just hearing their success stories, seeing their families and how they're now training their children, I actually have some children of former students now. It's just such a joy to see how, you know, the full circle goes around. So definitely watching them grow into their own calling. It's amazing. Challenges, you can't help everybody. They're not all success stories immediately. You know, and I've had students who have gotten killed. You know, I've heard the stories of them how they were in drive-bys and they died or somebody committed suicide. And those are definitely toughest, knowing that they had such potential and knowing all the factors that they had to, you know, live. And then, sadly, that's how it all ended. So that's got to be the hardest by far. 
  • 58:01 Raymond: So I have not had any children of former students yet because I'm still on the on the newer side. But I would say the most rewarding part is when we get to this time of the year, when we start seeing graduation, I love seeing the kids at graduation. I love seeing them at prom because it makes me feel like, okay, we did it. We got them here, right? And, you know, like I said, I had a student that invited me to his wedding. Why was I the only person that was not family that he invited? I don't know. I want to think that, you know, I made something good or, you know, that made them feel that I care and I deserve to be there. He invited me for the baby shower. That that student that visited us in the military, you know, like to see him, like, how mature he is now compared to like a year ago. I was like, wow, like you seem like a completely different person. So that that has been for me the most rewarding part. The most disappointing, I would say, exactly the same thing. You know, is that not everybody's a success story. I still struggle with with this part of the job, you know, that it doesn't matter how much I give of myself, like I can give my 100%, but it's not up to me. There's so many other moving pieces. You know, the student obviously has to do their part, but you know, like the fact that I can do all I can and just not being able to make the student successful is kind of disappointing. And then, of course when we had students who passed, you know, I've had students one died of cancer, like two months after graduation. And that broke my heart when I heard it, because I was like, you know, I thought he was fine. And you know, I am 29. So I'm like, I think I have my entire life ahead of me yet, like a 17, 18 year old to die. Like for me, it feels like that is really unfair. And, you know, we had students that have committed suicide. And, you know, I guess the most disappointing part is that we can, we don't have a magic one, and we can like fix everything. Because if I could, I, I would, I would try to fix everything, you know, like give a, give a home for these kids, adopt all of these kids so they can have, you know, like a parent here. I don't know how I would do with 173 children. It will be good for taxes, though. 
  • 01:00:59 Norman: And counting. 
  • 01:01:01 Raymond: But for me, that's the most disappointing part, that, you know, there's no guarantee that they're gonna be successful. I don’t know, I guess, I mean, there's no guarantee of anything in life. 
  • 01:01:21 Norman: Oh, I love what you said earlier about one of the biggest things you can do, just give hope. And you know, like you said, at 18, 19, 17 to 19, you know, your life is just starting there's so much ahead of you. So it's been a pleasure hearing about what you have to say. You can have a few, maybe another minute or two, if you have anything else to say, something you want to see in our community, or just any follow up.
  • 01:01:46 Monica: Sure. You know, one thing that comes to mind, and I love that saying that it takes a village, because it really does. A lot of our students don't have the traditional family. And I believe very strongly that the community can definitely help. And having programs for them, where again, we can give them hope, we can let them know that they are here for a purpose. There's something amazing that they can do. I think that would go a long way. And our community definitely needs to get together to give those opportunities for them, to find those opportunities for them, to find their gifting, to put their gifting into practice. 
  • 01:02:23 Raymond: And, you know, trying to trying to provide more for what they're actually interested in. I have a lot of kids that they, you know, they love working with cars. They love working on things. And, you know, it's kind of disappointing because we don't offer those programs at school. So I'm like, oh, that's what they're really passionate about. That's what they talk about all the time. That's what they want to do. But then we don't have the facilities. We don't have, you know, the program. And then definitely, like you said, they need a village. Like we as teachers, we cannot, we cannot do everything. And, you know, that the community could do a lot. And it would benefit back to the community because the kids are part of the community. And, you know, some of them, they're gonna settle here. They're gonna have their kids here. And it's, you know, we reap what we sow. That's how the saying goes? So, yeah, you know, like as a community, you know, as a town, as a county, I think we should look for ways to help them specially you know since we are an area where a lot of them live under poverty and some many of them are going through, you know, circumstances that a lot of people have not experienced as an adult but they have experienced those things
  • 01:03:51 Monica: And maybe giving them more opportunities that all of them need a certain number of service hours, they for ever looking for opportunities, that is something we can bank on, you know, give them opportunities to serve in different areas, so they can get a taste of different things that they can do that they meaningful for them 
  • 01:04:11 Raymond: And exposure, a lot of them need exposure, some of them when you talked to them about college for example, they are like, I don’t want to go to college, and I do you know what college is?, have you looked for the programs and all of that, they know nothing about how it works, they have never, you know there is no that education part on what it is, and then you have the kids that you know they want to work but they are not sure what their skills, so you know just providing different opportunities for them to be able to, you know chose their calling
  • 01:04:50 Norman: Awesome, I thank both of you for having this interview for PGCMLS Oral history project and I wish you the best, and thank you for being here today   
  • 01:04:59 Monica: Thank you
  • 01:04:59 Raymond: Thank you 

Interviewer

Norman Lezama

Interviewee

- MonicaWilson
- Raymond Feliciano

Location

Bladensburg Library

Citation

PGCMLS, Bladensburg Branch Library, “Monica Wilson and Raymond Feliciano Interview,” PGCMLS Special Collections, accessed February 9, 2025, https://pgcmls.omeka.net/items/show/80.

Output Formats